At (recently turned!) 19 years old, I’m not pregnant with you, nor am I even married. It’s safe to say that your existence is still several years away, but every time I see a baby, I think of you. I think of holding your little tiny hand and rocking you to sleep every night. I think of taking you to dance lessons or soccer practice or whatever it is you do, and I think of how proud of you I’m going to be to see everything you accomplish. I have so many wishes for you, and not only for you, but for my entire future family. I hope you grow up to be the twice the woman I am. I hope you become all the things I wish I could be. I want everything for you; I want happiness and peace and a life full of love. I want our family to be your home, your safe haven. When drama starts with friends, and boys break your heart, I pray that our family is where you come running (and hopefully, you’ll have some older brothers to take care of those boys). I pray that your heart is always filled with joy and that you see the beauty in everything. I hope that your attitude brightens a room and the people around you find a blessing from your presence.
As much as I wish it would be, your life won’t always be sunshine and roses.
When you’re in elementary school, boys chasing you around the play ground and sharing Barbie dolls will be your biggest issues. Broken crayons and sticky fingers will be the biggest messes you’ll have to clean up.
When you’re in junior high, you’ll probably start noticing a boy or two (Lord help me), and girls will start getting meaner. You’ll discover makeup and clothes and you’ll start comparing yourself to other girls and watching your weight in the mirror. Your face will fill up with little red bumps called pimples and weird things start happening to your body. Barbies and dress up clothes will be replaced with mascara wands and the latest fashion trend from Forever 21.
Then in high school, you may lose friends you had for years because that’s just what happens sometimes. People start making decisions that you might not be comfortable with, and you may feel alone. Teachers will be tougher and school work will get harder. You’ll still compare yourself to others and girls will still be mean. He’ll tell you he loves you and you’ll believe him, but then he’ll change his mind.
Through it all though, you will remain my daughter. You will be taught how to handle people who mistreat you and you will be taught to treat everyone with love no matter who they are. You will have a place in my arms that will be able to heal every cut or bruise or hurt feeling. You will have a family who loves you and you’ll have strong supporters to have your back at all times. Of course I hope you make good grades, have good friends, and find a sport or hobby that you succeed at, but more importantly, I pray you’re kind and compassionate. I pray you conquer the world’s ugliness with your inner beauty and those around you are graced with your tenderness and love. I hope you’re humble and you always treat others with grace. I pray that you desire God with your entire soul and you have a heart for others. Let God be your guide and trust him with all your heart. There are some things you can’t fully understand until later on in life, but trust me when I say that God never leaves you no matter how alone you feel. You are always loved no matter how you feel, and you are worth more than gold.
I can’t wait to meet you. You’re going to add so much meaning to my life.