Writing about this night has been on my mind since I decided to include my relationship with Ridge in this blog. The only reason I’ve been hesitant to write about it is because it’s personal and I’d rather not have all aspects of our relationship on display for everyone. The only reason I’ve decided to write about it is because it was incredibly powerful lesson for me and there might be a chance that someone else will need it.
(*disclaimer: I do not write about our relationship to make us sound all great and wonderful, because we are not, and I also don’t write to brag about Ridge. However, this particular night showed a lot about his character and provided an incredible lesson for me.)
Ridge and I love our Eno’s. We can hang and talk about anything and everything for hours, and hanging there together is where a lot of important conversations happen. That’s especially true for this night.
On this night I happened to share some information with Ridge that hurt him very deeply. I probably lost a little bit of his trust and (although he would never admit it) also some of his respect. I can imagine that in his eyes, the value of my love for him decreased just a little.
After a million and ten apologies and an ever growing stain of my tears on his t-shirt, he forgave me.
Actually, he forgave me before I even found the words for an apology. In the midst of his pain, he immediately forgave me and showed me nothing but love and kindness. He did not get angry, make me feel guilty, criticize, or chastise me. A hateful word never escaped his mouth, although it easily could have.
And then you know what? He prayed for me.
Moments after being truly crushed, he started praying. For me. Thanking God for putting me in his life.
I have never been shown that amount of grace here on Earth. That is true forgiveness. That night I learned (in my opinion) one of the most important lessons about love: forgive easily and forget quickly.
Then Peter came and said to Him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.” Matthew 18:21-22
The need for forgiveness will never expire. Jesus basically says to forgive an infinite amount of times. Humans aren’t perfect, and no matter how much you love someone, they will eventually let you down. That’s why forgiveness is so important in relationships. You’re always always going to need it.
When you truly forgive someone, it gives you peace about the situation. It allows you to let go of the hurt or anger. Being able to sincerely show forgiveness to those that have wronged you shows strength of your character. It demonstrates that because of the grace that God has shown you, you decide to show grace to others. God has forgiven the absolute worst things in us, so why do we think we have the right to refuse forgiveness to others?
Ridge has hurt my feelings since that night, and I’ve hurt his. It’s inevitable. However, forgiving quickly allows you to move on and continue loving. True love has no room for holding grudges. Grant others grace by your forgiving spirit. Forgiveness allows yourself and the one being forgiven an incredible amount of peace. Let your love be more important than your pride, and never underestimate the power of a forgiving soul.